A Living Inconevience

Alright. This is what I’m gonna do. I’ll sit in the bathtub, turn on the hot water, and slit my wrists. Bleed out slowly, nearly painlessly…damn, wait; who’s gonna clean it all up?

Okay, so maybe I’ll go out in the woods and take my buddy’s gun with me…no, they’ll question him and blame him for my death. I don’t want anyone in trouble for me dying. Back to square one.

So, what if I drive my car off the bridge? No, someone will still need to pick up all the pieces. I don’t want to be a bother to anyone.

Alright. What if I drove to Montana, gave my car away, and killed myself in a national park, far off the beaten path? No one would ever find me, the animals would find nourishment from my decomposing body, and most importantly, no one would have to pick up after me.

Shit. I don’t have the money to drive to Montana. Well, guess I better start saving up. This whole situation is becoming way more effort than it’s worth.


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